How to Carry Yourself
One of the three guiding principles or pillars of The Curated Chapter is Resonance where we discuss presence, alignment, how life feels, and the signal that we send to ourselves and to the world. By properly adhering to the steps of the other two principles (Reflection and Refinement) you begin to understand how you feel and how life feels, as well as how life is lived daily. As you move towards Resonance, it becomes more of an outward expression of who you are and who you are becoming. It’s more than a physical expression-it’s emotional, it’s spiritual. Resonance is an outward expression of who you are internally. But what does this look like exactly? Living with full Resonance requires that you hold four core traits: pride, care, decency, and gratitude. These may require practice and reminders to yourself from time to time, but they are well worth it as you become and live as the Better You.
Life will challenge you but you must never allow it to lower your head. If it ever does, ensure that this period is brief-lift your head. Pride, at times, is viewed as something negatively but this shouldn’t be the case. Carrying yourself with pride can be the difference between you continuing on or giving up all hope. It allows us to remember who we are and be proud of it. No matter what occurs in your life-good, bad, or indifferent-remind yourself of your core principles that shape who you are. This has nothing to do with your physical possessions that you may or may not have. This is solely about who you are as an individual.
It is important to challenge yourself daily. Push yourself, do hard things. However, as life pushes back, it’s also important that you are compassionate and forgiving to yourself. It’s not about being “soft” on yourself as opposed to recognizing when you need a breather after you’ve realized where the opportunity lies for improvement. Caring for yourself is about monitoring your mind, your body, and your spirit. Avoid the comparisons to others. Go for a walk or go to the gym. Find time to pray, meditate, or reflect. Carrying yourself with care is a form of self love.
Being a decent person is still a thing that exists. Having decency and not being a cruel human being doesn’t mean that you are letting your guard down to allow others to run over you. You can still remain stern-letting your word be your word-in fact, this will gain more respect. Having decency rejects the feeling of coldness that can often come across with the lack of care for yourself or others. Give respect when it is due. When it is not shown or given back to you in return, draw a line, but don’t allow the actions of others jeopardize who you are or your character if at all possible. The curse of living without decency invites a bitterness that eats away at you from the inside. It darkens you and the entire world around you wherever you go.
While this may take time and require practice to master, always find yourself searching for things to be grateful for. On the cloudiest days you can still have gratitude. It doesn’t have to be anything that you view as being a big deal. Look for the small things to be grateful for. This may be even better. Water it and carry it with you. This isn’t about being delusional to the reality of what’s happening around you. It’s about, in spite of what may be happening, conditioning yourself to being intentional about where your thoughts rest.
Whatever happens within the world will happen, but there is only one thing that you truly have full control over and that is yourself. Perhaps that may sound like a cliche. But how often do you find these four traits absent from you? How often do you see them lacking from others? Remember that this is about your journey. This is about the daily practice of you becoming better each day. Carry yourself with pride-head held high and standing on your principles. Remember to give yourself grace and care. Avoid being cruel-live with decency. Search for the little things to be grateful for. Life is beautiful, therefore, find the beauty in it. Embrace these characteristics and allow them to become a part of who you are.
